New

Something happened to me when I came out to my mother a few days ago. To have her look into my tear filled eyes and say “…I don’t understand…but I will support you always…and I will never love you any less..” has changed me. In those moments it was as if all of those chains that held me, as if all of the ties that kept me beneath the surface, had been broken. The air I breathe, I breathe more deeply. I’m filled with new passion and purpose. I walk into the world with a new sense of being. I walk into the world with a new confidence, having seen and experienced on this earth, unconditional love.

There are times in our lives when God allows us the opportunity to catch a glimpse of what life is truly all about, times when we realize that who we are, what we do, and what we have to contribute, is about more than we can ever conceive of. It’s times like those that visions are born, that aspirations are realized, and that hearts and minds are opened. I’m experiencing this right now and it’s resulted in a new level of self-acceptance, and in turn, having only been back in the city for less than 24 hours I find myself being more expressive with others than I’ve ever been before. It’s nice.

In a reply to an email from a friend here in the city a few days ago I told her that I was gay. She and I started out at the same church when we moved to the city a few years ago. I suspected that she and a few of our other friends suspected but had just been waiting for me to tell them. Her response to me was quite awesome, and her prayers for me and my family as we travel down this road together are felt and appreciated.

I’m going to respond to her some time soon just to explain why it took me so long to spill the proverbial beans. I’m going to tell her that far more than knowing the intricate details of my sexuality, I first want people to know and to see that I absolutely, unequivocally, beyond all doubt, adore Jesus Christ. It’s my belief that just maybe when they can see Him in me, the conversation can truly begin.

From uncovering me, to another side of something. Here’s to a new chapter.

-Bryan