The Dreadfullest Dread of all Dreadfulnesses

There is no more terrifying moment…no more horrendous occurrence…no more bloodcurdling event…than that moment in which your ipod battery runs out while in a packed subway car!

The anxiety that forms as the pulsating sound of your favorite remix slowly fades into the distance, being quickly replaced by the obnoxious grunts, sighs, outbursts, and fruitless conversations of the 75 plus passengers that tightly surround you can bring one to the very brink of insanity. I equate this mind altering experience to the experiences relived in such movies as “Open Water”, “Lord of the Flies”, or “Cast Away”. Suddenly I am left floating in an ocean of cold metal, glass, and ceramic tile…attacked on every side by screaming children, pushy passengers, obnoxious teens, and people from New Jersey.

Truthfully…I know not how I survived!

I glance over at the ipod-less woman beside me intensely focused on her best selling novel and I wonder… "HOW?!” She seems either totally unaware of her surroundings or completely content in this world of westernized sound. I glare at her curiously…somehow hoping that our eyes will meet and I’d glean from her some bit of insight, of erudition. But, I garner nothing. As the train slows and the doors open..i watch her as she slowly rises, closing her book, and pushes her way through the crowd (including the two men from Queens who have been discussing weight lifting etiquette for the past 20 minutes) and she is gone.

Approximately 15 minutes later I arrive at my destination. As I move through the car doors and onto the platform I breathe a sigh of great relief. *Actually, I practically dry humped a platform column*

Just another spectacular day in New York City!!